Yelling At The Toilet

I got to know Joey’s bathroom intimately since 4:37 AM this morning – I’ve had the worst case of the flu I can ever remember.

There was no point of going back to the couch after each bout of uncontrolled vomiting, so I just brought in a few pillows and tried to sleep between the bathtub and toilet.

So, I had lots of time to think, but not much stamina to make the fevered thoughts count. I ended up doing things like counting the stripes on the dirty towels, and the little spots on the linoleum floor. I also read the labels of all of the cleaners under the sink.

Once the sun came up, I did have a little epiphany – I figured out what was up with the constant donations of $20 bills from passers by. Turns out my OS was set to emergency mode, which includes calling out to the nearest friendly e-punks (Gabby was waiting for me to come out of the restaurant), and the immediate acquisition of $10,000 in cash. Since I have no bank accounts anywhere, I’ve been pushing the minds of everyone in a mile radius to hit the ATMs and seek me out. Very showy, but less dangerous than a super powered bank robbery.

That doesn’t explain the money in my jacket, before I passed out – how long was I here before I locked myself in the bathroom at Fat Slice? Or did someone leave me in the bathroom? I still haven’t figured that out, and whether I was attacked, or if I just decided to asphyxiate myself with the plastic Amoeba bag.

No matter. I managed to find the command to turn off the emergency broadcast action, but despite myself I couldn’t stop the sickness. I’ve managed to keep down a few pieces of apple Flavumm that I found in the living room – takes like Hi-Chew, only fluffier.

Joey is out of town – he and Gabby took off to somewhere secret, to bring back someone who was eager to see me. I don’t understand why they just couldn’t call upon me virtually – now that I’m etched, I’m good to go for all forms of Ghost chat.

Of course, all I could stomach was some web browsing, and I soon realized that I really didn’t read that newspaper closely the other day. The date was correct, but everything else was tweaked in weird and wonderful ways, so much so that I’m not sure if the fever was getting the best of me – the augmented reality digital thermometer hovered between 103˚ and 104˚ all day.

Not that it really matters – I don’t even know who’s reading this blog anymore. Could it possibly be reaching the same audience as before, or am I just sending random thoughts into the ether?

It’s hard to say – I just think it, do a little editing of the transcription, and send the text to what seems to be the same authoring environment. It’s not like anyone was really reading it before, so it’s hard to know who there’s now.

The only thing that’s clear is that on my end, everything seems consistently different. I can’t find any mention of Die Database, or any of the other “Operation Bloggyblog” posts – no Miranda, Kaia, Emily or Ai. I can’t even read my older posts, save for what I started this week. They’re not there at all for me… I just have to assume they’re gone for everyone else, too.

Right now, my biggest fear is that my memories of the recent past will suffer the same fate. I already can’t manage to bring up what happened on the 4th of July, and what I could remember yesterday seems so weird and dream like.

I know I’m missing something that’s terribly important, but all that’s coming up now are dry heaves and that same shit smell. I guess I’m simply not immune to the common bugs of this Variant – hopefully someone here has invented a quick, open source fever buster and vaccine booster download I can torrent.

I’m willing to pay for relief – I’ve got a fist full of $20s that I can’t wait to spend.

Click to continue RGA

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2 responses to “Yelling At The Toilet

  1. Hello I’ve been reading this blog for Die Database news before all the stuff happened. It’s been pretty distressing lately with all the updates about plastic robots and lying on the floor bleeding. Everything seems the same on this side. I can see all the other posts and blogs too. You are the only one that has been active. So you may still have some connection to… 237?

  2. I’m glad to hear from you! (Even though I don’t know who you are). I don’t know how you’re able to see these words – maybe I’ll find out once Joey and Gabby come back from their trip on Saturday. Everything feels really weird now – I stopped throwing up last night, but I feel like I’m doing a combination of sleepwalking and daydreaming. Even the tiniest dust bunny under the couch seems cosmically significant (don’t ask why I was looking under the couch….) and if the apartment caught on fire due to pyromaniac winged fairies I don’t think I’d blink. Oh well…. I think I’m going to watch some more downloaded TV and movies – everything is new on the other side of the mirror, and even the surreality shows seem awesome.

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